Michael 18, Amy 24, Uncle Kenny, Aunt Vickie, Kari 16.Pray for these precious people.
My Aunt Vickie was a living example of what it means to clothe yourself in the presence of our Lord Jesus Christ.
She was the most selfless, humble, joyful and beautiful-hearted person I've ever met. I mean that with all my heart. Even in the midst of suffering, she gave God glory.After battling ovarian cancer since 2006, she is in Heaven, cancer free. And while I force myself to rejoice that she is with her King, I can't deny the pain of knowing she is no longer with us here on earth. I prayed and prayed and prayed "God, heal her." And when He answered our prayers, I wailed in agony, "God, how could You?" And he said "But Heather, you asked Me to heal her and I did." All I can say is "I know, God, I know."
My mom kept from me for about a month that Vickie wasn't doing treatment anymore. I actually just found out this past Saturday. I literally cried all of Saturday night and all day Sunday. Sunday morning, I read this in my devotional Jesus Calling:
"When you trust Me in a given area, you release that problem or person into My care."
I felt such a deep pain after reading that line because I realized that trusting God can hurt like hell. I had to trust Him that He was going to heal Vickie, whether that meant freeing her of cancer physically or freeing her of cancer spiritually. I cried because it hurt so bad knowing that freeing her of cancer spiritually meant taking her from us. He took her Home the very next day, Monday September 13.
I have to confess that I denied her condition for a while. It felt safe being up here in Tennessee pretending that she was better than I knew deep down inside. I never wanted to see her weak. I wanted to pretend that she was the Aunt Vickie I've always known. After seeing my pawpaw as a stroke victim, I was scarred by having to face the way sickness takes a person's life while they're still alive. The last time I saw my Aunt Vickie was this past Easter when she stopped by my grandparents' house. I don't even think I told her goodbye. I couldn't. I was so selfish just so I wouldn't have to deal with reality. But if my mom would have told me sooner that she might not be here much longer, I would have gone.
I laid in bed last night thinking about her in Heaven. I visioned her on her knees before our Father while he held her face and said "Welcome Home, child." I could literally picture her sweet face filled with beauty and health, crying, looking the King in the eyes, thanking Him over and over again. I KNOW she is thankful to be Home. I KNOW she is rejoicing to feel no pain. I KNOW that Heaven is exactly where she is supposed to be right now.
